As the silence grows louder and louder

as the silence grows louder and louder
i struggle to find something comforting
i want/need to cry, but the tears just won't come
i want/need to talk but the words are lost to me
i want/need to sleep, but fear keeps me awake
surrounded by people i still feel so alone
i can't fill the emptiness
i can't erase the guilt and shame
i can't play this game anymore
a game i am always losing
i am so tired
i feel so weak
i long for freedom
but my cage gets smaller everyday
there is little air left
i fear soon i will be at the point of no return
that i will live in this prison
until i die in this prison
i do not want to die
but i just can't remember how to live

Kim (9/99)

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